Life Goes On…
Life Goes On
*This entry may need proof-read 🙁
It has been a long time since I updated this blog in English.
During so many days of self-questioning what I am, this blog became a place where I jog down things I feel, sometimes emotions I do not even realize. Writing in Japanese is my way of conditioning myself.
I am about to come to the end of this agonizing journey; questioning myself and redefining my identity. Then, I thought, it might be a good idea to leave my writing in English, my future primal language.
Having said that, this is a personal blog by a native Japanese guy, pressuring himself to write in poor English. Therefore, any comments and advises regarding my English writing (such as spelling, grammar, or even expression) would be appreciated. The more I receive correction, the better I can leave my authentic feeling in writing.
Life Goes On….
Looking at the calendar on my Macbook screen, I realize the last day I had a flight from US airport was a year ago, September 5th in 2013. It means that it has been a year since my life had changed so dramatically, shifting from the identity as an heir of Japanese traditional embroidery art to the freedom as a nobody who can focus on family.
An heir of Japanese traditional embroidery (Sashiko) Artist family sounds cool, doesn’t it?
I wasn’t a big fan of this family tradition simply because everyone thoughts that I had to be the next generation of this tradition. I did everything I was supposed to do to be the one, but I never was an actual candidate… until we experienced the big horrible earthquake in Northern East Japan, 2011.
After spending several months in damaged area, with people who lost their precious thing, in order to re-established what they value, I determined myself to “protect” this tradition. I finally came to the conclusion that “Sashiko” is my identity, the way I will spend my life on.
The decision was good. Probably, Sashiko is what I am going to pursuit throughout my life.
However, sacrificing my time fully on my family business (not the arts or tradition) was not my fate. My father told me that, not verbally, but through memories after his sudden death.
The end of 2013 was a chaos, mentally and physically. The first half of 2014 was a challenging term because I needed to redefine who I am. No matter how I feel about myself, Life just goes on. It is the beauty of this world. I have learned many things.
So, here is my writing of “finding myself.”
* When the right time comes, I will restart my project with Sashiko. It was my identity. It was my life until 2013. I needed some time off from it, but I guess I cannot cut the whole connection to something I loved so much once.
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